


When Blaine Started Liking Bears

by BlasphemousProphet



Category: Glee
Genre: Angst, M/M, also some rimming, character exploration, post klaine breakup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-24
Updated: 2015-01-24
Packaged: 2018-03-08 22:15:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3225404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlasphemousProphet/pseuds/BlasphemousProphet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karofsky and Kurt could not be more different and Blaine finds himself lost in the wide gap between the two of them. Takes place in Season 6, canon compliant. Angst. You've been warned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When Blaine Started Liking Bears

Karofsky’s apartment was ridiculous. No, Dave’s apartment was ridiculous. Blaine still hadn’t gotten used to calling Karofsky Dave. Also not Karofsky’s ridiculous apartment. Their ridiculous apartment. Jesus. Between this and Karofsky’s tons of exes and his participation in Country Bear Night Blaine couldn’t help but thinking he was overcompensating for his years of bullying. Being gay wasn’t natural to Karofsky. Wanting guys might have been natural but being gay- finding his own subculture to exist in that was different from Kurt or Blaine’s- was definitely not natural for Karofsky.   
“We don’t need to talk about Kurt all the time,” Blaine told Karofsky.   
Karofsky was curious about Kurt and Blaine’s life in New York, about Kurt at NYADA, about Blaine coming out, about Blaine and the Sadie Hawkins dance, about Blaine and how many exes Blaine had.   
“You don’t need to shave,” Karofsky said, coming up from behind Blaine at the bathroom mirror, wrapping his arms around him. “I like a little facial hair.”  
“A little?” Blaine teased. He couldn’t imagine ever not shaving. Kurt never shaved but he liked to sit in the bathroom and watch Blaine shave. After a few months of doing that Kurt asked if he could shave Blaine. It was a surprisingly intimate act, a sharp razor so close to Blaine’s neck and the man he loved wielding it without breaking eye contact…  
Fucking Karofsky was not like fucking Kurt. Karofsky slipped a hand into the front of Blaine’s boxers and Blaine tried not to think about the differences between him and Kurt.   
Karofsky fell asleep right after sex and slept like a log. Kurt would loll around in bed after sex talking hazily to Blaine about anything and everything.   
Karofsky and Kurt did like some of the same things, though. They liked when Blaine looked up at them while he was sucking their dicks, taking the whole of them deep into his throat, looking up at them with his brown puppy dog eyes, resisting the urge to gag, just on his knees devoting himself to his boyfriend, while they put his hands in his hair and sometimes ran their hands through it until there was more hair than hair gel and whispered to him that they liked his natural hair.  
Karofsky was affectionate with Blaine, pulling Blaine onto his lap during breakfast, feeding Blaine in restaurants, holding Blaine’s briefcase while Blaine searched his pockets for the house keys…Kurt had never been openly affectionate with Blaine and Blaine had died a little inside every single time he had reached for Kurt’s hand during a duet in Glee club and Kurt had stiffened and pretended like he didn’t see or feel Blaine. Every time Blaine tried to lean his head on Kurt’s in the movies and Kurt coughed delicately, signaling to Blaine that this was not something Kurt wanted. Every time Blaine tried to put his hand in Kurt’s back pocket as they strolled down Madison Avenue. That was what happened when you spent most of high school getting bullied for being gay by Dave Karofsky. Jesus.   
Karofsky wasn’t afraid like Kurt was. He didn’t have to be. He was bigger, stronger, and he could pass for straight where Kurt couldn’t. He wasn’t delicate or lean like Kurt but he had a dependable satisfying body that Blaine kind of liked.   
The first night they muscled their way in to Karofsky- Dave’s- apartment, ripping off shirts and belts and shoes and Dave had stared at Blaine naked until Blaine was embarrassed and approached Blaine quietly and pulled him into a kiss while squeezing his ass and Blaine remembered what it was like to be swallowed up whole by a person and that was not what was happening here…  
Dave had a hairy asshole. Blaine had to steel himself before licking it but Dave was so grateful, came so loudly and so wildly, that the whole thing was very satisfying. He didn’t talk in bed the way Kurt did (sometimes dirty talk “ugh, you’re so fucking desperate” and sometimes just “I love when you touch me like that” and sometimes just “I love you” talk) but he was pretty noisy and loud and when he rimmed Blaine, slipping a finger into Blaine’s ass while Blaine rested his chin on a pillow, opening Blaine faster than Kurt did, using less lube than Kurt did, less slow care and attention than Kurt did.   
At a certain point in Karofsky sex process he seemed to disassociate from Blaine and just focus on himself. Kurt had never done that, except for the roleplaying times when Blaine had wanted to just be used by Kurt and Kurt had complied, enthusiastically. It wasn’t like that with Karofsky. There was no desperation in the way Karofsky thrust himself in and out of Blaine, just rhythm. When Blaine had suggested the roleplay to Kurt Kurt had thrown him on the bed in reckless abandon and delved into Blaine like it was something new again. When Karofsky came, Blaine sensed that no matter who he was with, Karofsky’s cumming was a private thing and it didn’t matter what partner Karofsky had because it was just a personal part of him that could never be shared. Not Kurt. Kurt’s grip tightened on Blaine when he came. Kurt liked to be as close to Blaine as possible during sex, close enough that Blaine had liked to joke that Kurt was bending the laws of physics to reach Blaine’s lips during sex. Blaine lay down and Karofsky stood and the whole thing seemed too quick to be anything, really.   
Blaine had tried to introduce Karofsky to different kinds of sex, different kinds of intimacy, eye contact, cooking each other dinner, slow methodical taking apart of each other, but Karofsky groaned and just asked Blaine if they ‘had to do this right now’ and Blaine found that without Kurt’s enthusiasm and ingenuity for intimacy in private, safe places relationships were just not the natural, soul bursting, spirited, dominating things that Blaine had assumed they all were. Relationships had to be maintained. Blaine had thought all relationships worked sort of like his and Kurt’s had.   
Kurt kissed Blaine’s knuckles one time when they got home from the movie theater, as an apology, and Blaine wanted to bury himself in Kurt and never come out. Kurt turned Blaine into a black hole of need and desire for constant validation, comfort, stability and love. Blaine hadn’t even known how lonely he was before Kurt. With Karofsky it was different. Blaine found he didn’t wonder what Karofsky was doing when he wasn’t with him. Blaine didn’t care if he never got to the stage where he might share a bathroom with Karofsky. Blaine didn’t care if Karofsky didn’t love the things he loved, was passionate about the same things Blaine was passionate about, shared the same friends, shared everything, really. Blaine didn’t care if Karofsky never surprised him with a bow tie as a gift for no reason. It was unlikely Karofsky even knew what a bow tie was. Kurt knew exactly what kind of ties Blaine liked, what kind of ties would be new and different for Blaine to wear but still in his comfort zone. The bottom line was Kurt knew Blaine. But he didn’t anymore.   
No one could ever replace Kurt in Blaine’s life. Karofsky didn’t even qualify as a serious contender. But now Blaine knew what it was like to be loved, really loved, and all he could was hope one day he could learn to love himself as much as Kurt had loved him.   
Kurt really was Ohio’s most eligible bachelor. Blaine couldn’t imagine anyone not wanting Kurt. It was Kurt that hadn’t wanted him in the end. It was Kurt that hadn’t wanted to lose himself in Blaine. It was Kurt that walked away but it was Blaine that fell apart. Yes, Kurt was handsome and smart and funny in a witty or sarcastic kind of way and sexy and sweet and creative and talented and original and brave. Kurt was all of those things but Kurt had also ignored Blaine for a year in New York, distanced himself from Blaine and all of his ‘emotions,’ called off the wedding, made Blaine doubt himself more times than he could count after Blaine had changed everything for Kurt and now Blaine was filled with so much resentment and anger and regret whenever he looked at Kurt that he doubted he would ever be able to even be friends with Kurt again, much less be alone in a room with him.   
Kurt and Blaine were over and it was for the best. Besides, Blaine had Karofsky now, who thought he mattered in a way Kurt hadn’t back in New York. And Blaine had Dalton and a new life in Lima. Kurt was his past. Those who don’t learn from the past are doomed to repeat it, George Santayana had once said, and there was no fucking way Blaine was ever going through that heartache again. He might not survive it this time.   
Kurt divided music into piles like Makeover and Cherish Yourself and that was exactly what Blaine was going to do.   
THE END


End file.
